Big Changes Start Small: The Scaling Question

Gary Watson — Mon, 18 Oct 2021 15:06:14 +0000

Big changes start small. This is what I learned from behavioral theory. There is a lot of overlap between effective behavioral change and Solution Focused Brief Therapy. Steve deShazer, co-creator of SFBT said he doesn’t know why SFBT works, he just knows it does. After studying work about behaviorism and developing habits, I put together some of the reasoning behind why it works.

Scaling Questions to Help Think Small

One of the things we do in SFBT is use scaling questions. We ask a client where they would rate their current progress from one to ten, with ten being the best. Then we look at what you’re doing right that lets it be that number instead of a lower number. Next we will look at what a half number higher will look like. Sometimes I even ask for a smaller increase in the number, say one quarter higher because big changes start small. What we’re asking clients to do is think about small but noticeable changes they can make. These changes should be really easy to perform and implement.

Small Changes Are Easier to Keep Going

Making one small change not only makes a difference, it’s also easy to keep doing. This is what behaviorism has taught me. Changes have to be small and easy for us to keep them going. When the changes are too big, you can do it for a short time, but soon get burned out by taking on too much at once.

Behaviorists sometimes talk about one percent changes. They recommend looking for ways to start with 1% improvement of the behavior at first. If you improve by 1% every week, then in two months you’ve improved by 8%. In a year, you’ve improved by 52%. This is good improvement compared to changing by, say, 50% in a week, and then quitting whatever you’re trying to improve because you burned yourself out.

So when I use the scale, I ask you to talk about what a 1 or 2% change in behavior will look like for you. I want you to start small on purpose so you have success but aren’t overwhelmed by trying to do too much too soon.

Gary Watson is a Solution Focused Therapist in Grand Rapids Michigan. He provides counseling for couples, teenagers, and adults. He can help with anxiety, depression, stress, college and work stress, relationship problems, and more. For more information, please visit the website at www.turnaboutcounseling.com.

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How to Change Your Identity

Gary Watson — Sat, 07 Aug 2021 03:37:04 +0000

In solution focused counseling, we usually start with a deceptively simple question, “ What do you want to see change as a result of counseling?” In a big sense, we’re really asking, “how do you want to change your identity?” Or put another way, how do you want to change how you view yourself so that you can start doing things that work better for you?

For example, if you’re socially anxious, I want to know how you want to see yourself in the future. If you see yourself as fearful in social situations, worried about how people will judge you, then how will you view yourself when things change for the better? Maybe you’ll see yourself as brave even when you make mistakes at work. Maybe you want to be someone who is comfortable in stressful situations. Or, maybe you want to be someone who can take calculated risks.

We don’t just want to change behaviors, we want to change your identity. We want you to change how you see yourself. You probably have a lot of negative things you think about yourself and this affects how you interact with the world around you. When you make a determination about how you want to be different, you start changing your identity for the better.

Change Your Identity with Small Changes

James Clear, in his book, “Atomic Change”, comments that there are three areas of change, 1) Outcomes, 2) process, and 3) Identity. Most people start with trying to change the outcomes. For example, they may want to quit smoking cigarettes. However, starting with the outcome in mind, can make it hard to change the behavior of smoking. Changing the process (how you will quit smoking) can be a step closer in the right direction. But changing your identity is probably the best way to change the process, and then the outcomes change on their own.

Let’s take another example. Let’s say you want to get better at keeping your house in order. Cleaning the house over the weekend is an outcome. Putting things away, vacuuming, doing the laundry etc is a process. However, what if you decide to start thinking of yourself as a fastidious person who likes orderliness? Then you will find you can keep this new identity about yourself going all day long.

Start With Small Changes

You may start noticing those things you tend to leave “undone” around the house and start taking small, frequent steps to keep things put away. You walk through a room and notice some dishes on a table and grab them as you walk into the kitchen. Once you’re in the kitchen you notice the box of cereal you left on the counter and decide to put it in the cupboard. Feeling good about what you just did, you walk out of the kitchen and take something from the kitchen that can be put away elsewhere.

Changing how you think of yourself—changing your identity— can lead to small sustainable changes in your behavior. These are new habits you develop that start to add up to bigger habits and behaviors. Soon, you can be that new identity you were afraid couldn’t happen.