I’m not sure whose quote this is, but obviously someone in good shape. But it makes perfect sense. If you do some checking about how many calories you can burn doing any particular exercise, it doesn’t really amount to many calories if you’re trying to lose weight. For example, if you walk for an hour, […]
I counsel lots of people who are trying to get other people to behave differently. This may be a parent who is trying to get their kids to behave better or do their chores. It may be someone who is trying to get their spouse to treat them more with more respect. It may also […]
Many of my clients, especially the younger ones get frustrated because they have things they want to accomplish, but they have trouble getting themselves to start. They want to exercise more, but can’t get themselves to the gym. They want to study more but can’t get themselves to open their books. They want to socialize […]
More often than I like to think about, counseling fails to help people. I have a few clients who come to counseling week after week, we talk about how to improve their lives, they agree heartily with the suggestions I make, then come back and nothing has changed. Did you try the suggestions when you […]
This time of year, many of us are trying to establish new healthy habits through New Year’s resolutions. One great way to do this is through “Decisive Moments”. We tend to focus on the activity that gets us the results we want, such as going to the gym three days a week. What is more […]
We all struggle with getting motivated to do things we need to do but don’t really want to do. We say things like “I have to go to work”. I have to clean the house”, “I have to do my homework”. This takes something that is a necessary task and makes it somewhat more difficult […]
Many of us try to start a new habit for New’s Year’s resolutions. We resolve to exercise more, eat right, lose weight, and so on. Right about now is when most people abandon them. I’m probably one of the only successful people who have kept their resolution for years. About 25 years ago I made […]
Big changes start small. This is what I learned from behavioral theory. There is a lot of overlap between effective behavioral change and Solution Focused Brief Therapy. Steve deShazer, co-creator of SFBT said he doesn’t know why SFBT works, he just knows it does. After studying work about behaviorism and developing habits, I put together […]
One of the things I do in my counseling practice is help people figure out what positive changes they want to make in their lives. In doing this, we figure out what exactly it is that you want to be doing differently, and why. When we do this, we come up with ways to help […]
If you’re trying to make repairs to your relationship, or just trying to change bad habits or create better ones, one small change can make a big difference. At this point, you may be waiting to read what the one thing is. Don’t be disappointed but there isn’t one thing that works for all situations. […]