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building self-esteem Children Individual Counseling Teenagers

Self-Confidence from Competence

I counsel a lot of teenagers and young adults who suffer from low self-confidence. These are both boys and girls, men and women. One thing that sometimes happens is they find themselves staying in relationships that aren’t working for them because they’ve been allowing their self-worth to be dictated by being in a relationship, or […]

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Individual Counseling Relationships

Why I Hate This Sign

This sign is basically a lie. It’s what I call “blowing sunshine”. You’re not important, special, amazing, or extraordinary merely by walking into a room. No more than you are a professional athlete merely by walking into a gym. The good news is that you CAN be important, amazing, and extraordinary if you’re willing to […]

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Individual Counseling Marriage Counseling Relationships

Marriage Counseling: The Art of Apologizing

In my Grand Rapids counseling office, I see a lot of couples for marriage counseling, and one of the top requests is to get help with communication. What often happens is that communication breaks down even before a conversation starts because your spouse has an idea of how you’re going to respond to them and […]

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Individual Counseling Relationships

Improve Self-esteem: Doubting your Doubts

While counseling a young man who has a tendency toward self-doubt, we were discussing how we tend to view events that occur to us through certain filters which in turn effects our self-esteem. If we tend to have lower self confidence in ourselves, we will tend to, for example, dismiss genuine compliments from others as […]

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Individual Counseling Marriage Counseling Parenting Relationships

Relationships: How Criticism Can Drive Someone Away

Below is an article written by a married woman who caught herself criticizing her husband over trivial things rather than focusing on his positive qualities. It was ruining her relationship. She realized her attitude toward him was causing him to feel unloved, unvalued, and basically treated like a child. In her case, her husband had […]

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Individual Counseling

Counseling for Life Stress: Taking Detours

When I provide counseling to people in my Grand Rapids counseling office, they often make progress for a few weeks, then have a day or two when things don’t go as planned. For some people, they tend to view these momentary setbacks as some kind of failure, or proof that they are “always” screwing things up. In […]

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Individual Counseling Teenagers

Counseling for self-esteem: “I tried it on and it fit”

As a counselor for teenagers and college students, I often see clients who are struggling with personal identity and need counseling for self-esteem and to develop a personal sense of identify. High school students, college students, and young adults often have trouble figuring out who they are and exactly how they should navigate their world. […]